(Guest Post by Matthew Ladner)
MM: Hows it goin eh? So I am Matthew MacKenzie, and this is my sister Lisa Graham Mackenzie…put on your touk!
LGM: <putting on hat> COO LOO COO COO COO COO COO COOOOOOOO! Good day!
MM: Good day! Sos our topic today is education…
LGM: Education? Do you need me to teach you how to open a beer again hoser?
MM: No! Ifs I didn’t learn that after the sixth lesson or so, I’da thirsted to death already!
LGM: You….learn? <snorts>
MM: Yeah….okay…..so good day, we are here today to talk about education in the United States.
LGM: They have education in the United States? I thoughts the test scores were even lower down there than yours hose-head?!?
MM: Yeah, well, they are, check out how high Canada is on this ranking eh!
MM: You may have to squint but Canada is near the top! United States, er, well but at least some American states are making progress…like getting a lot better…
LGM: Oh you mean like BEER! Remember when just a small number of breweries made almost all the beer, and it mostly tasted like stagnant pond water?
MM: Yeah- kinda like that! So’s now some states have kinda done the microbrewery thing for schools eh? Sos more people can find a school that they like!
LGM: Beauty! And hosers like you can find a beer you like!
MM: Yeah so the state with the biggest gains did microbrewery education in a big way eh? Ands you can read about in our column in the Arizona Republic!
LGM: What’s the Arizona Republic?
MM: You know, it’s like the Moose Jaw Times Herald, but even better and for Arizona!
LGM: Okay…So if they keep making gains they might be able to do advanced Canadian math problems like this one:
MM: Yeah…that’s what we call “applied math” up here in the Great White North!
LGM: Beauty! So we wrote a column and it ran, like, in the newspaper?!?
LGM: Sos why does this post have a MacKenzie theme eh?
MM: Take off- you’ll have to read the column to find out, eh?
LGM: You take off hose-head!
MM: Okay so that’s our show for today eh…good day!
LGM: Good day!